Life on the Road
So, I left you on a bit of a Cliffhanger Eastenders stylie last time. You'll have to go back and recap if you can't remember, but I was rabitting on about my travels through The States and had just touched down in Sin City after meeting some crazy Aussies who had invited me and my 2 friends to their shot-gun wedding. This was back in 2008 and to the present quickly as I have just got back from Turkey where I have been on holiday the last week. Weather was fantastic, food was even better (lots of meat for you like-minded carnivores out there) There were, however, maybe just a few too many British people and those of the predicament to embarrass us other Brits by shouting out how they want their 'Ham, Egg and Chips' cooked whilst singing karaoke particularly badly. I also went fishing, caught a fish (my fella didn't), beat him on numerous occasions at draughts and failed at a 4-2 pool attempt (he is on the pool team at the pub though come on!)
And no, I'm not competitive at all ha (this is a joke!!) Anyway, that was last week's antics in a nutshell. Now, back to the bright lights of Vegas.
So we had arrived at The Luxor with just 2 hours before we were supposed to meet our bride and bridegroom to be. It was all chaotic trying to check-in and find our room. I had never been inside somewhere so huge as some of the hotels and casinos in Vegas. Its like each establishment is its very own world. We had opted for the huge pyramid of Egypt, with Sphinx and all. We got in, rushed through trying to make ourselves look pretty whilst all being equally dumbstruck by the lights of the Boulevard and the permanent ching-ching of all the machines in the vicinity. We rushed through the humid heat to Planet Hollywood where our new friendly couple poured a few bottles of champers down our gobs before getting shoved into a stretch limo. They obviously shoved a few bottles down their own gobs too as were clearly very nervous about their impending lifetime of together-forever-ness. We were on a bit of a drive by the looks of things and suddenly the limo pulled up to a little white story-tale chapel. I really was in the movies at this point as Elvis came swaggering out armed with gui-tar and welcomed us into the chapel.
Was this real? It was like something from The Hangover, not that it had come out by this point of course. The funniest part of the marriage was definitely the vows as Elvis spoke only as Elvis. "Craig, do you promise not to treat Lil like a Hound Dog? Don't Step on her blue suede shoes and do not leave her at the Heartbreak Hotel?" " I promise not to treat her like a Hound Dog......" Yes you can full-well imagine the capers. I don't think I could stop laughing, at one point I did think "Oh its so romantic", and my laughing turned to a slight weep, but then it was back to laughing again. This was just the start of the evening too.
From the Wedding Chapel, we then left for Caesar's Palace. We left the love birds to it whilst we went for a little flutter. $42 up ching ching!
But they soon called us back to play up with them. They had even saved us some of their yummy wedding dinner of lobster in some doggy bags. Clearly being very refined ladies we tucked in there and then...
However it wasn't long before some sub-plot of The Hangover began to start getting recited once more as Lisa, my lovely friend (who's just celebrated her 30th birthday - Happy Birthday and the girl in the middle of the eating pic!!) started to feel a little strange. Her hand started to blow-up, yes, she hadn't realised she had an allergic reaction to the lobster we had eaten. Anyone seen Hitch with Will Smith?? So in amongst the wedding night craziness, Lisa was running around the casino shouting 'Help - I've got anaphalactic shock, Help!' I had no idea whatsoever where I was at this time, but she did eventually find the right medication and she does live to tell the tale. I found myself in LAX nightclub stumbling around meeting some new crazy friends, I'm pretty sure at one point I walked into some sort of S&M party in the club and then got pounced on by our new bride as she gave me a huge smacker on the lips. I wondered where her new husband had vanished as I was sure that's what she was supposed to be doing with him. Maybe he was watching from elsewhere?! The club emptied out, I was, as always, the last person to get removed from the premises (I make this my trademark wherever I may go) and at around 6am I retired to a bar and to pump a huge amount of notes, which I couldn't really see, into a blackjack machine sat on the bar. Stand, hit, oh its all the same really. Needless to say my $42 winnings earlier plus a few hundred more was vamoosh straight into thin air. Love ya Vegas!